3 months and 3 weeks to go...

After a lot of brainstorming, comparing and arguments, at least, we booked our major suppliers. As follows:

Church - Mary the Queen Parish, Greenhills
Venue - North Greenhills Clubhouse
Caterer - Centertable(Mrs. Rose Valera)
Photographer - Paul Vincent
Videographer - Jezreel Cruz
Florist - Angel of Hearts(Lawrence Dela Cruz)
Cake - Sugarbox(Emily Uy)

Super dami pang needed. Feeling ko nagcracramming na ako. Sobrang hilo na ang utak ko ano ang uunahin. Im 6 weeks away before I go back to Manila. I want all contemplating ngaun na so I can proceed with the legwork agad.

Im so disappointed with him. At the moment we are looking for hotel preps. I've been crazy on how we can pull it out through with limited resources. Tapos nauna pa niyang naisip kung ano mararamdaman ng kamag-anak niya. Hay, kelan ba kami pedeng magdesisyon na kami lang at walang influence ng iba. Lahat ba kelangan ng go signal ng ibang tao. Im really upset with how this preps is moving!!!!!!!!

Second time around

After all the heartaches, tears, serious talks, we are secretly planning again our wedding. For those who can read this blog that are close to our hearts, I hope you keep it first to yourselves and let us(Chris and I) announce the engagement when the time is right. We are overhauling our suppliers this time because of the change of venue.

The Date:
We would like to keep the date, 17th February hopefully 2008 is the year for us.

The Church:
We are considering Archbishop's Palace. It's small chapel where we can an intimate wedding. It accepts Sunday weddings. The location is very private, no hassle and bussle of sidewalk vendors.
But we are also thinking of NSDG, though it's overused by the networks and of course of so many brides, this is still shortlisted.
How about UP Chapel or Dela Strada in Katipunan. We are not UP grads so it's not of sentimental reasons, while Dela Strada is just a suggestion.

The Venue:
It depends on the church. We want a garden venue, since February is not a wet season.
For Archbishop, we are eyeing on Wack Wack or Palladium. We haven't seen any of these, Chris needs to visit when he gets back home.
For NSDG, were considering their garden.
UP Bonsai Garden, quite fine but the church is the question.

The Motif:
Still rainbow. We have to stick with it, I'm almost done with the souvenirs.

The Theme:
Enchanted garden

Photographers:

We're decided that we'll get the service of Paul Vincent unless we'll fall in love to another photographer's craft and style. We just love his shots. check his blog http://paulvincentphoto.blogspot.com/
We would like to hire a back-up photographer for some reasons and we would like to get Jayson Arquiza but we have to deal with Paul Vincent back-up first.

Videographer:
Take a pick:
Jezreel Cruz / Ariel Javelosa / Reel Deal / Shierdan Pamintuan.
We cannot decide, they are all within our budget and our taste.

Caterer:
We still want Centertable Catering.
http://centertablecatering.com

No bookings yet, some doesn't accept pencil booking. When Chris is back home, he'll have to start contacting the suppliers, when I go back in April I will help him. Now, we only rely on emails, websites, feedback and recommendation from W@W.

Sana ito na nga!!!!

12 long years

What is this again...he can't come here to stay. What's happening, at first we cancelled the wedding now he can't come to stay with me....are we not meant for each other. After 12 long years why only now these things have to happen. It seems all forces are joining to keep us apart, what should I do now? Lonely to be alone, no one to turn to in this country and the only hope that I'm holding is somehow disappering.

Cancelling reservation

I asked my mom to cancel all the reservations we made before I left Manila. Is this part of wedding preparation? Everytime I think of the cancellations I cant help but cry.

Just the other day, while I'm chatting with my friend, she asked me if it's all worth it...I dont know how to answer her cause I dont even know if it's all worthy to sacrifice my happiness and choose career over my wedding. I know I'm not happy here being alone and all I know that this man I left in Manila is the only one who could make me smile again. But with my contract here, how can I push through with our plans again. Now, i just wanna be with him again and nothing more.

Signs

Five years ago or maybe 6, I asked for the 1st sign. I said that if it's still worthy to wait for him after the break-up let him call before this certain day(I think it's Friday) and he did but the problem is, he called a day after I set the deadline. What the heck does that mean? Though I don't understand, I still accepted him without doubt, giving myself a justification that it's still acceptable.

After a couple of years from that, we decided to start our new life together through a formal vow. Preparations came and still doubt if we made the right move, maybe because I see in him that he's being skeptical of the idea. I asked for signs again, not 1 or 2 but 3 and indeed He gave me 2 positive answers but the last thing I asked is the one that bothers me so much. And like the first sign five years ago, it gives me a negative impression of our plan(maybe that's why Im here where I am). I have to stop dreaming my own special day and face the thing He offered me thinking of what the message it brings. History repeats itself, I justified again that it will bring the good future to us.

But weeks passed after I arrived, wedding plans were brought up again over the chat. He asked me to marry him before the year ends in a simple and small ceremony. The idea keep me awake for almost every night in months. A friend made me realize how lucky I am to have someone thinking of me almost every minute of the day and that made me say that "yes, I wanna get married". But there are other things I have to think considering our situation right now. Then, I said there's only one thing that could validate my decision, I'll ask for a sign but this time it will just be 1 sign. I asked to bring him where I am. One sign that could make me say yes or no.

He is suppose to be here with me already, but what happened? Is this the last sign. Up to this time, I'm still waiting for a miracle that God would grant me this one, but where is he? If he's not here now then he's not going to be here tom or next.

Should I believe on these signs? How many times should I ask for it, di kaya nakukulitan na ang Diyos sa akin? What is His message, I don't understand, or maybe I'm just in denial of the fact that we are not meant to be together...forever? should I decide now...do I really need to choose...the sign or him? I'm afraid of choosing, I will definitely hurt the both of us. Head or heart...what do I choose...where do I go?

Love Story

I tried this on the net, at naaliw talaga ako sa result. You may want to try it also...http://www.love.2loop.com/

here it goes....hon, I hope you like this, ikaw talaga nasa isip ko while doing it!

One charming summer day at Manila you see the most pretty creature you have ever seen. Their name is chagne , and every move he makes just turns you on more and more. You nudge your best friend me and say, "Wow, that has to be the most lovely body I have ever seen." Suddenly, he looks in your direction and starts walking right towards you!!! he says, "I noticed you staring at me from over there. I just had to tell you, that I think you are so beautiful , and was wondering if you'd like to go to Bangkok with me and listen to the radio ?" With a stupid smile on your face you say, " actually " and go with them. When you finally get to Bangkok , he moves closer to you, and gives you the biggest kiss ever. The two of you are passionately kissing, when you feel a apple hit you on the back of the head. You open your eyes to find out it's all a dream, but there is a note left next to your bed.

First book

this is the first book I have for my babies...I hope they'll love it



to my future babies...I've been dreaming of you for couple of times already. I know you're just waiting to be born and I'm even more excited to see you all! I promise that I'll be the best mom I can be...momsy

Dreaming of a wedding

3 months and 2 weeks to go before I suppose to be married to the man I long for to be with. What I know now is, it will not happen in the near future. Everytime someone would mention anything about wedding, I can't help myself but drop a tear. It's still painful to me everytime h2b and I talk about the wedding. Sometimes Im grateful that we have to move it but it always saddens me that it we will not be able to push through the original plan. I miss preparing for our wedding so much...now I'm back to dreaming again!